Dear Mr. Smith,
Thank you for your application for a position at the English Language program of International Christian University. We received a very large number of applications and the process of selecting the top candidate was a difficult one.
I am sorry to say that you were not selected as a final candidate for a position at this time.
I will keep your application materials on file for the next year and contact you again in case we have any unexpected openings during that time.
The selection committee appreciates the time and effort you went to in applying to ICU and we wish you the very best in your future career.
William T Hooker, Director
English Language Program
Date: 14-Feb-2007 16:09
Subject: Re: ICU Application
To: William T Hooker
Ye, wotever, I no its been like totally ages since you mised out on the gratest oputunity you have ever had (eg hiring ME) and you totally ruined my xmas but i dont care. im a survivor foo', and i new that my skillz wud be totally apreshiated as long as i had faith in myself and my lord. i like to feel that the lord touched me and now ive got myself my dreamjob as a translator for a ringtone company. ha! wot you think of that ay? i bet you didnt even find anyone else for the job and now you totally regrettin not givin me a holla to take th job after all!!1111!!!
hay, if you want i can send u over a sms wiv the lords prayer to the tune of Vengaboys for a discountid rate. itd be like potery in moshun and ironic. definitly ironic.
Dave Smith, fo real.